Friday night tears!

Feb 03, 2008

I just watched Friday night lights and i almost cried a few times... That show really makes you think about life and everything in it! I have been thinking alot about my own life and i really need to make some changes...

I need to save money and get a car. Dave and I have had the WORST luck with cars and have only had one car for almost a year now i think... It sucks. When it appears that we may have 2 again the other breaks down... But now mine is gone for good... I hate it with a passion.

Dave needs a better job. When we both have a car of our own, Dave needs a new job... I know it sounds mean but he does way to much and takes way too much for what he is being paid. He has so much potential to have a really good job and make really good money and he doesnt take it, and i dont know why (other than the car situation). So, i am hoping that i can pep talk him into taking that first step at a better future when the time is right.

I want to get the hell out of here. I need a new place without all these stupid rules and regulations and stalkers! AHHHH! Cant they just leave me the hell alone? We want to rent a house for a year or two then get into buying...

I want to get married and have children. I am soooo ready. Dave and i are ready to be married and have children but again, money. He wants to get me a ring and i dont want to rely on anyone else's money to pay for our wedding. I want to be in a stable home and a stable income before i have a baby. I dont want my children going through half of the shit that we went through as kids when our parents were poor. My dad especially, a single parent to 4 children. I remember one time i had babysat and got money and my dad had to use it to buy us dinner because we didnt have a penny. Nothing... Not that i blame him or anything, i know he did the best he could at all times for us, but i just dont want my children to ever go through that... I am so ready to be a mom.

So, basically, it all boils down to money, as usual. First step is the car, then the job, then the home... I have it all figured out, its just now up to doing it already. I can start saving soon and then we will be on our way. i want to have the first 3 things done by december when our lease is up... That is my goal, that is the only way... So it must be done. Someone please pray for us!