Desert gargoyles

Apr 06, 2008

I can’t even begin to describe the senseless vastness of the northern plains and the immortal deserts of the road. The bus station was a lonely and humbly lightened building, the only visible evidence of human presence for miles around. I fell asleep just as we left the city, and when I woke up and looked out the window, I saw my soul a thousand miles away. I climbed down from the bus to catch a breath of fresh air and a cigarette. I happened to look up. There were giant clouds spread as velvet across the whole sky. The horizon surrounded me every way I turned my head. I was out on the world and realized it immediately. I also wanted to take a leak, but the bus station looked so horribly grim, like a coffin with neon lights in it. I climbed back into the bus which was almost empty. There were only three other passengers, all of whom were sleeping. The only one who had gone into the station was the driver. I decided to take advantage of the bus’ sanitary facilities. I mean, it wasn’t forbidden or anything. I had paid for a bus with a toilet. I was ready to get my money’s worth. The bathroom was as small as you can probably imagine; one of those bathrooms in which spreading your arms is not an option. I proceeded to take a piss. All of a sudden the door flies open. And the bus driver appears right next to me and starts staring at my dick. He wasn´t even close to looking at my eyes or anything else besides my dick. He starred at my penis for what seemed as the longest time. He finally looked at me and said:
- You got to go outside.
He was fat and small, greasy looking. His face was shinny and half of it was hidden behind a mustache that reminded you of The Revolution. We were both quiet and starring at each other while the sound of my falling piss substituted an otherwise awkward silence. The whole thing was happening so fucking slowly.
- Ok.
He slowly closed the door without dropping his gaze from my eyes and just as the door was about to close completely his eye dropped at my genitals again.
I finished my business in the bathroom and got to my seat just as the bus got back on the highway. I looked at the window, just for a second, and got caught in the vastness. I drifted away from my seat onto the infinite plains that laid ahead. I can´t remember anything but the same scenery for hours. Perfect flatness covered by thousands of cactuses piercing out of the ground. The mountains were the only thing moving, dusk danced on top of them. The last ray of light bounced off from the top of the highest mountain, and night swallowed my eyes. There was only the humming of the bus and the dashboard’s light reflecting on the driver’s shinny face. What perfect serenity and utter peace. I realized how I could be actually free falling right now without even noticing it. We drove for a long time into this bottomless pit. Finally there was some sort of light ahead. Human light. It was another one of those bus stations. They all looked the same. The front wall was a huge glass with neon light shinning out of it. It looked like a giant fish bowl. I needed to stretch my legs and eat something. I also had this weird need to get out of the bus; I just needed to be out there again. I was out there alright. As I stepped out off the bus, the only thing that I could see was the station and the bus. It was as if everything around the station had been sprayed painted black. I walked into the station to grab something to eat. As I crossed the doorway I heard a tiny bell ringing over my head. The whole place looked static to the extent of ice. It was that fucking plastic light, it was as a veil of death covering the entire store. I walked over to the chips and as I considered the different possibilities that presented themselves to me, I looked over to a man standing behind the counter. He was starring deeply in my direction, with a look of stone trust and iron calmness within himself. I felt as if I was being surveyed by a fucking sphinx or a Parisian gargoyle. I glanced into his eyes just to let him know that I wasn´t afraid of him. We were locked. He wasn’t going to quit, so I just broke off from his gaze and continued selecting my supplies. I grabbed a lot of shit. I could barely carry it. I wasn`t grabbing them, I was more like hugging them around my chest. Seriously, I was even taking shit that I knew I would dislike. But the road still stretched through miles of sheer desert, and all risks had to be taken. That was a mighty priority all throughout the journey, by the way. I stumbled carrying my candy cargo all the way to the counter and dropped it in front of the attendant. I looked up at him expecting him to start punching keys in his cash register, but instead of that, he just kept starring at me with that stone look.
- Yes…
(And he kept starring at me.)
- Mmmm.I would like to purchase these – I said, pushing my candy further in the counter towards him.
Not a muscle in his face moved. I kept starring at him. I moved my hand in front of his face to see if I could get a reaction, but he was still frozen. I started walking backwards without dropping my eyes from his. And he followed me with his eyes; he never broke contact. Now, this was all very puzzling. I was the only one in the store, but still I looked around to see if I could get any support. I approached the gargoyle again and stood in front of him. I turned around and then snapped screaming.
- I’m going insane!!
I started yelling and jumping around the store, hollering like a monster. I ran out of air and stopped. I hung to his eyes, the only visible sign of life in him, and slowly backed out of the store. I heard a bell ringing as the door opened behind me and the attendant’s neon glaze followed me out. Just as I stepped outside, a raging wind slapped me in the face; one of those waves of dust that sweep all throughout the plains for miles without end. My hair danced on top of my head and my eyes shut close. I guessed my way back to the bus. The wind had somehow carried the darkness with it, and as I climbed into the bus I turned around and caught a glimpse of the convenience store and its plastic lights just as they were being swallowed into the night; it was all black now. I heard the door closing behind me and went to my seat. Soon, darkness caught up with me, and night swallowed this dream as well.