Prologue

Apr 15, 2008 - 20:42 PM PST
Today is no different from any other day. I’m still in the same place I left off. I’m still lying on this bed of mine when I wake up. It’s not like I’m expecting to be somewhere else but just once, I would like to fast forward my life to where it’s easy for me to live my life. God, for all I know, that could be 60 years into the future where I’m retired and I live through my children and grandchildren.

As for now, I’m not going anywhere fast, of this I am sure. Another thing I am sure of is a break down seems to be in my near future yet as much as I’m trying to avoid it, I’m not sure if it’s a necessity for me to graduate to the next part of my life. I’m sure whether to look forward to this break down or to cringe at the very sight of such a word.

I sometimes think love and where I fit in. What if we’re all just bouncing off of each other? We take what we need and leave what we hate. Initially, we try and find that spark that speaks to our souls to make us stay. Maybe we're just ricocheting off of one another. Not just playing with each other’s feelings and emotions but literally bouncing off the other person’s body. And we, sometimes, leap off the one person to make headway to the next but most times than not, we past by the ones that really matter. We either brush by them or we don’t even touch them as we go by the next person. By the by, what if we pass by the love of our life and we never find them again but only by strange coincidence. And this is all because we are too ignorant to accept. It’s like an ultimate love story happening every second that we don’t take our times to get to know the person across the room. The love story being two people not finding out their true potential in the other.

To change the subject, stress attacks me almost in every aspect. In this, I am a cynical and skeptical person towards most of the certainties in life. I have trust issues but let down my guard only with friends. It’s hard to do this. You almost have to give your life for mine; or perhaps just know me before high school started. I don't mean to intimidate anyone but sometimes it happens and it's beyond my control. I know that sounds like an asshole excuse but if you don't understand then there's no need to.

I'm grammar obsessed and I will judge you with where you put your periods, if you capitalize and if you take the time to spell-check. If you don't do any of these things then I don't see the point in establishing a genuine relationship. I will see you as a very uneducated person that's not worth anyone's time. I'm just putting the warning out there.

All in all, I would completely say that I'm only but a child under construction. And you? Well you can be my next muse.

Prologue


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1 Comments

Apr 16, 2008 - 18:57 PM

banakiwi on
love the honesty in your prologue (yes i read it all) ;) sry for spelling mistakes, but i'm german and i had to learn my english in school, so i hope it's not too bad ^^ and you probably won't believe me, but...the things you say about letting down your guard only with friends and the child being under construction...aren't we all just children of our parents? and aren't we all just under construction most time of our life? ^^ yeah, i don't know, i guess i just wanted to tell you i really love your prologue, it sounds different and honest! thx for not judging me without knowing me :)
*hug*
Vincent