awkward-ness

Feb 23, 2008 - 08:48 AM PST

i was hanging out with my high school friends plus this nigerian guy name mahmood.
they were all guys except for me.and my friends were telling me on how rich mahmood is and if i wanted to date him or anything.and i said no, i wont.
and the whole night they're trying to set me up with mahmood.but i always avoid being near him.its not that i dont like him or whatever but i guess i dont wat a relationship right now.

at this moment, i guess having a boyfriend, however appealing the idea sounds, is just not for me.
and believe me, im not a lesboff or nything.its just that i thing having a relationship at the moment is at the bottom of my to do list.

im just trying to figure out why, because a teeny bit of me DO feel envy at those couples in trains or parks.
maybe i feel that its my responsibility to take care of EVERYBODY before actually putting what i want first.
either that,or maybe im just so fucked up that my mind works on mysterious ways.