I Don't Want to be A Zombie

Sep 04, 2008 - 02:02 AM PST

I'm curious as to why it's easier to express the imperfections, the sadness, the inequalities. Perhaps its what everyone wants to hear, or maybe our generation really is that emo. We feel no need to hold back what really grinds our gears; we know who we are, and are not afraid to express. It's exactly what the Hippies wanted to do, but in turn they paved the road for us to make the difference instead. I'll try and not disappoint.
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"Give me that corpse please, the one they tore nightly; I really want it now."

I dare you to find meaning in these lyrics, even I can't. Yet it relates to me. But how? Information, the all-knowing truth? It's all I want out of life, after all. I could care less of the squabbles between humans, I want an answer that can answer everything. EVERYTHING. Perhaps it really is Forty-two (Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy). Strangely, it sounds logical to me. Leave it to nonsense to really make sense. Or is it really just me?

Squabbles of humans? Wow, I couldn't sound more inhuman. Perhaps I'm not human at all. I've come to realize I contain few emotions; a sense of humor, no problem. How else can one cope? Religion? Maybe.
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In all honesty, I no longer know anything anymore. I no longer know my friends, I barely recognize my own family. Fuck, I barely know who I am. I contain a different thought each day. Luckily, I learn something new each day. Whether it's someone coming out of the closet, or that Homeland Security has been breached by the most primitive of hacking. I loved that story too; way to prove how vulnerable we really are. I find more comfort knowing how close we are to the end of the world than if we were in a Utopia of sorts. Fucking pessimism.

"It's the end of the world as we know it." How did REM know before all of us?
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There's no meaning to this blog. Only insight. Not to mention I am nowhere near sober. It's easy to see how things are when not in the correct state of mind. If so, then I feel clouded from all the emotions and feelings humans feel. I almost hate that; I want to not be human. Not dead, but not alive. Not zombie either; brains don't sound like good food. Or does it?