In the NOW...

Apr 30, 2008 - 17:41 PM PST

Music... is it a truth to say we hide behind a lyric to confirm a true feeling?

For so long I have buried a sense of self in a studio filled with instruments that allowed me to strum away an inspiration. I left behind songs that would forever remind me of a past long gone...

I thought it to be therapeutic...

But even now... looking back.. masking the truth with a melody hasn't helped me... but prolonged the inevitable.

This experience has made me believe in the power of the now. Who I am is not who i've been... that alone has made all the difference. So insecure in my own skin-- never knowing if the words made sense, if the actions i took spoke loudly... but now.. my presence has made an impact. What i'm doing makes a difference. How can that not change me.

Keep your eye on the prize. "Say what you mean..mean what you say"...the relationships I build now... are because I've built them. My name stands alone... and it is the most amazing feeling.

So im not hiding behind anything for a change. I"m not stepping aside so that another may excel... now is my time to excel.

I'm not writing, i'm not singing... i'm not expressing to mask a truth... instead I'm just saying it.... living it... believing in it... and not setting it aside for another day to deal with.

All i have to give is right here... in the now...