My World Falling Apart - Part One

Mar 26, 2008 - 06:28 AM PST

Its been about a month now
but my world is still kind of falling apart.

I haven't been the most focused person I should be and the best person I could be.
Distractions Distractions DIIIIISSSTRACTIONS!

So you want to hear about the girl named Emily that has ruined my life completely .

She was my best friend of what could have been 6 years this year.
BUT
Once she started Highschool
she changed well she didn't change she really just got worse.

She carried her self very very much like a tramp basically.
its a terrible thing...and i feel sorry now that she is gonna go thru highschool with that title on her head everywhere she goes.

Its gonna carry on till she is an adult

Anyways this is the story

She was dating a guy...
the guy really liked her and she really like him.
but she was treating him wrong in that within 2 weeks of them dating she hooked up with a girl.
So she was dating him and her.
He was uncomfortable and i saw him really sad one day.
I said come talk to me and he explained to me wat was wrong.
I talked to her and told her u r really hurting him and you need to make a choice it is utterly her decision.

So within about 2 days she completely broke up with him and he was so sad.
So i was like the hell is she crazy he treat her like a queen.

So i kept talkin to him and stuff and we started to get really close and stuff
She pulled me aside and was like well i think you and him should try to get together and i was like ok.

So I did...
we were already gettin a lil ya kno lol hehe

so like basicallyabout a week after she broke up wit him, he and i got a lil hitched.
ONe day she saw us like dancing and being silly and she was like the F!

She started then talkin smack

I remember it so well

Al and I were kinda gettin together it was the first days
Al and I's best friend came and whispered in my ear

Emily is callin u a whore and sayin 'i thot friends dont date ex's'.

We were passin right by her and I shot a look at her
it started my hate i never thot i could truly have...it started right there
Kevin held me my fists got so tight and i started walking off like kevin begged me to pissed off Al saw me so angry and held me

Relax Michelle
Dont say anythin to her

I had never been so mad

"I am not al now get the fuck off of me" and i shoved him off i never been so angry no one no friend of mine had ever seen me SO Angry or angry period.

Sat and relaxed a few other friends till transfer and walked my ass to the bus and went home.

Al and I talked all that night
I wasn't angry wit him i told him i was angry at her at the situationeverything.
I told him things that have happend to me and this is what was said

ME: its ok...
dont worry bout it
not like anyone can do anything for me anymore

AL: y cant i

ME: i dunno babe i just dont have faith in love
or hope or anything anymore
i really dont
he like just said
he dont need me anymore i said wow u sound like my pops already

AL: ok i understand dat but im not him baby

ME: i kno.
i just god i can't be hurt im scared of being hurt again
im so tired of givin my heart and havin it just ripped apart

AL: ok i understand dat then instead of goin wit me let me prove 2 u i wont hurt u

ME: how?

AL: the same way i put a smile on ur face 2day
look michelle baby i wouldnt have kissed u if i didnt care about u so let prove 2 u dat i wont hurt u

ME:k
im so scared i really am

AL: ok but ima keep doin and bein the same way wit u til u see dis

Me: k *muah*

AL: LOL
O IM SORRY BOUT WAT HAPPENED AT THE BUS RAMP

ME: im sorry too
i should have never shoved u off of me
i was so sad when i watchd u walk away i wanted run to u
im sorry

AL: its ok i was thinkin dat u were mad at me so on top of bein upset at emily i was said cuz u walked away from me

HE wanted to prove it to me
prove love again
i wasn't sure
i was so scared to be heart broken
but i was strong enough to have the faith that he was tellin the truth somethin told me he was so i said ok.

So much has gone on since ...Emily makes it hard for hte both of us
We are still learnin eachothers likes and dislikes
Communication is key with us

But thats enough for part one part two i will put up in a few days